Have you ever had a guy walk up to you in a bar and use corny pickup lines on you? Was one of those pickup lines “pleasure is my middle name?”
I am sure that the answer to the question “was the experience savoury?” is ‘No’.
Well, thanks to a devious technological advancement, straight out of Black Mirror’s episode, Be Right Back, you can now own someone whose middle name is actually “Ultimate Pleasure Experience”, a marketing phrase they have added to the name.
The certain someone is the male love doll, which comes with a technology that can get you an erect penis just by taking out the flaccid one and seeing the erect one rising out from behind. And so, you get a real experience of a man with both flaccid and erect penis. The best part about it is – you are in total control!
Love dolls have been around for quite some time now, especially the Japanese ones; there was a film made about one too, called Air Doll.
Anyway, these dolls were mostly blow-up types and exclusively female.
So, you would think that women and their needs and wants aren’t neglected in these progressive times of ours, but here you go.
With the number of female porn consumers steadily on the rise since the last decade, it was only expected that something for women would be on the rise.
Under the brand name ‘Sinthetics’, “Real Doll” has done just the thing.
And ladies, no more expectations and trepidations about being satisfied anymore; with the Real Doll model you can have him as long as you want. Just pop out the erect penis and you’re good to go.
And guess what, if you wanted a French boyfriend or an Italian one – you can get that too. ‘Sinthetics’ gives you the freedom to choose the colour, nationality, or race of your Real Doll boyfriend. Just imagine which nationality tickles your pleasure sensations and go for it. If you want a rugged look, you can even opt for some pubic hair or some delicious trimmed happy trail. It’s your creation – swoon over it once it arrives – loaded with the stuff your fantasies are made up of. No wonder they call a model – Gabriel – the angel that would liberate us from all our fantasies!
It is at this point that I must pop the question: do straight women really need men anymore or has this pioneer company made them completely redundant?
You can’t say this wasn’t expected. For years, the concept of love and the practice of dating has become dependent on physical attraction as humanity crazily hurtles towards an apathetic futuristic experience.
Was this what we were preparing for?
The dolls are no longer blow-up, but very lifelike and completely customised for the user and are made of silicone, which gives them a real, human-like feel.
This is one of those moments in history when love takes a turn towards a new definition I believe. As the capitalist, bourgeoisie, sensation-driven existence drives us and we buy things to fulfil the deep lack of meaning in our lives, maybe this is the ultimate answer to the void that fills our millennial minds.
After all, this is someone totally tailor-made for us, extremely attractive hence and can “satisfy our every whim”, every twisted, intimate fantasy we can think of thanks to our unfulfilled childhoods which we refuse to grow out of.
Or maybe, this is when people actually realise that no, this buy-and-be-happy life is not something that’s for them.
So, what is your opinion on this?
Featured Image Credit: Youtube Video Screenshot