Many of us are not born with immense confidence. We either grow it in the process of passing through life, or we end up being captives of low self-esteem. This situation is terrible for anyone as it results in a person becoming engaged in terrible relationships or taking relationships decisions. Here are some of the ways in which low self-esteem can affect you:-
1. Trying To be Saved
You have always had the feeling that you do not really have the strength or courage to build yourself. You think that you are broken and that you are undeserving of love or any affection. As a result, you can never really love yourself. You are always waiting for someone to come in your life and pick you up when you are down. And maybe, they will be able to love you in a way that you expect to be loved.
2. Am I really loved?
It is entirely possible that someone is in love with you and you are in a relationship. But doubts will cloud your mind all the time. Since you have never formed any kind of love for yourself, you will question the love of others towards you. You will be doubtful whether you are actually being loved or just being used for something. You will question how anyone could love someone like you who doesn’t deserve any bit of it.
3. Not giving enough
You do not want to give your very best in the relationship because somehow, you are afraid that you will end up becoming vulnerable. You are already broken in a way, and you have seen how breakups and separations can mess people internally. You do not want to experience that in your already broken self. Rather, you would keep a part of you from participating in the relationship as collateral.
4. Not Being Able To Believe
Sometimes, we just need to believe that we are in a good place and that it is entirely possible to be in love and be loved. But somehow, we just end up locking ourselves in the room and never really leave it. The thing is that women are resilient and they could be so even when they are experiencing something negative. So, they will stay within their self-created room for a long time without breaking out.
5. Putting in too much effort
You put in a lot of effort to find a partner for yourself. It is because you do not really have any kind of confidence in yourself that you end up being desperate and obsessive. You try to attach meaning to common things and fantasize about it. In a relationship, you end up putting your partner on a pedestal and obsess about them to a point that even their simplest words can hurt or move you.
6. Trying To Be Secure
As a woman with self-esteem, it is not only relationships that affect you. You are also questioning your ability to earn for yourself. So, you look outside and try to use whatever you have to secure a kind of pathway for easy money. As a result, you may end up being someone who uses their body or their looks to trap a rich person and thereafter, uses them to gain some kind of financial security. You become dependent on them completely, even though you may not love them.
7. Looking For Situations That Aggravate Your Problem
This is a strange situation but if you are insecure, you will be looking for situations that will make you even more insecure. It is quite probable that you feel this way because you are already aware of how the situation will turn out to be. So, you feel secure in such insecure situations. You believe that things will turn for the worse, that your partner would leave or be abusive, etc. If none of this happens, then you become uncomfortable in your relationship.
8. Selling Yourself Cheap
You don’t value yourself enough and so you sell yourself less. Whenever a person shows some kind of interest in you, you fall in love with them or at least force yourself to fall in love with them. You know that they may not be the best for you because their behavior or acts enrage you, but you feel lucky that someone has actually shown a bit of interest towards you. And that is all it takes! You do not really exercise any choice in those kinds of relationships.
9. Closeness Affects You
If someone, even your partner, gets too close to you, then it begins to affect you in a bad way. As you never expected anyone to actually love or become a part of you, this kind of closeness really rubs you the wrong way. You might start to disbelieve in the love that your partner is showing you.
10. Letting Your Partner Take The Charge
You do not take part in any decision. You fail to understand a situation, or even if you did, you are not too confident about it. As a result, you give all the charge to your partner. They engage in all kinds of decision making and you are left out of it because you chose to do so.
It’s important that you start to value yourself when you are in a relationship. Just believe that you are lovable, if not to the world, at least to yourself.
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